Prayer Part 2: Contemplative Prayer
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Prayer, for many of us, has turned into this thing where we just make a list of demands to God. Prayer has become this kind way to offer our wish list to God. And when we do that, God starts to look more like Santa Clause or like the Genie from Aladdin. Often times, in our prayers, we go to God and say, “God, give me this. God, give me that. God, heal this person. God, heal that person. Do this. Do that.” And that is okay. That is not always bad.
But this type of prayer is often more focused on our own wants and needs and desires. And this really isn’t very transformative. At its core, this type of prayer sometimes turns into this attempt at our trying to control what is happening. It is our attempt at trying to get God to do what we want, when we want it. In this type of prayer, we often treat prayer like a vending machine – Where we put in a dollar, press a button and we get what we asked for.
But Contemplative Prayer is a different approach to the way that we often pray. Transformation is at the center of this approach. It is a transformation of our minds. Contemplative prayer is really this idea of entering into a new mindset.
And for some strange reason, a lot of people have pushed back against this spiritual practice. Some people think that it is too Eastern, and it opens you up to worshiping other Gods. But really, it doesn’t do that at all. It is simply seeking a deeper relationship with God through meditation and silence. This is something that the church has been doing since the beginning.
In fact, I think that this is what the Apostle Paul is talking about in Romans 12:2 when he says… “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God—what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
We can think of the Greek word “Metanoia” which means literally to change your mind and change your way of processing and receiving reality. And this takes a lifetime of practice.
Even as early as the Tenth Century, the monks in the West said that there are three levels of prayer.
1. Orazio (or-aut-zio) which is spoken prayer. This is the prayer that we most often engage in. The prayers we say in church and before we eat.
2. Meditazio (medi-taut-zio) which is like Lectio Davina – reflecting on a passage. Kind of a reflection. A lot of people have prayer journals. This is like that.
3. Contemplatzio (contem-plot-zio) this is where you move beyond words. It is prayer in silence.
So, contemplative prayer transforms and renews our mind so that we can look and see what God’s will is instead of imposing our own will in our prayers. And it is done in the quiet, in the silence.
Contemplative prayer is a way for us to enter into the understanding that we are living in God’s world and not the other way around. Thomas Merton once said, “One thing is sure about heaven: there won’t be much of you there.” Now, Merton wasn’t saying that you won’t go to heaven… he wasn’t condemning anyone to hell. But he was pointing out this idea that God is so much bigger than we realize. And we are so much smaller than we realize.
In other words, the world doesn’t not revolve around us – we are not at the center of the universe. We have to let go of the self. It’s not so much (as the saying goes) thinking less of yourself as it is thinking of yourself less.
And Contemplative prayer is a way for us to do that… and to literally live into prayer. As the Apostle Paul says, “Pray without ceasing.” And when we think about that phrase, at first it that sound impossible, doesn’t it? You know, how can anyone pray without ceasing? How can you always be praying? How can you pray when you’re talking on the phone or eating dinner, or sleeping at night even?
Father Richard Rohr is a Franciscan Monk who has done a lot of work in this area of Contemplation. And he says, “The way we pray without ceasing is by living in conscience union with God.”
In other words, it is simply being in the presence of God. Being still and knowing that God is God. Living into God’s presence. Contemplation is not really about saying words. Instead it is about how you live your life. It’s about living in the presence of God. Living in the conscious union with God. That is how you pray without ceasing.
In his book Wishful Thinking, Frederick Buechner talks about this interesting understanding of prayer. He writes the following, “We all pray whether we think of it as praying or not. The odd silence we fall into when something very beautiful is happening, or something very good or very bad. The "Awwweee!" that sometimes floats up out of us as out of a Fourth of July crowd when the skyrocket bursts over the water. The stammer of pain at somebody else's pain. The stammer of joy at somebody else's joy. Whatever words or sounds we use for sighing with over our own lives. These are all prayers in their way. These are all spoken not just to ourselves, but to something even more familiar than ourselves and even more strange than the world.”
We are praying in our quiet moments, in our joyous moments, and in our painful moments by simply being in a state of conciseness with God. Even when we cannot articulate our prayers, we can still be in prayer and live in prayer. It is a mysterious thing.
Richard Rohr puts it very simply. He defines Contemplation as “a long loving look at the Real. Real with a big R.”
In other words, it is a long loving look at God. Again, it is not so much saying a prayer as it is living a prayer.
John Wesley was someone who lived into this idea of prayer. In his writing A Plain Account of Christian Perfection, John Wesley writing about prayer, saying,
“God’s command to “pray without ceasing” is founded on the necessity we have of his grace to preserve the life of God in the soul, which can no more subsist one moment without it, than the body can without air. Whether we think of; or speak to, God, whether we act or suffer for him, all is prayer, when we have no other object than his love, and the desire of pleasing him. All that a Christian does, even in eating and sleeping, is prayer, when it is done in simplicity, according to the order of God, without either adding to or diminishing from it by his own choice. Prayer continues in the desire of the heart, though the understanding be employed on outward things. In souls filled with love, the desire to please God is a continual prayer. As the furious hate which the devil bears us is termed the roaring of a lion, so our vehement love may be termed crying after God. God only requires of his adult children, that their hearts be truly purified, and that they offer him continually the wishes and vows that naturally spring from perfect love. For these desires, being the genuine fruits of love, are the most perfect prayers that can spring from it.”
Wesley really lived into this idea of continuous prayer. And Contemplation invites us into a way of being connected to God – and letting go of the self – so that we can find transformation in our hearts and minds.
Richard Rohr calls this the ego or the False self. It is this image that we try to portray out into the world. And it can be anything – it can be that you’re confident (when you are really insecure), or that you are a certain type of pious Christian (when you actually struggle with your faith). It is the image that we give out to the world, and even give to ourselves, that we need to let go. And then, we are free to really be our true selves. We can be who we really are in Christ.
Jesus talks about this all the time in the Scriptures. This is what he is constantly getting on to the Pharisees for. Jesus is constantly inviting us to let go of our selfish desires. Let go of that ego. Let go of that false self. Let go of that façade you put out there. And now, look to God and to your neighbors. Jesus calls us to the denial of self.
As he once said, “If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me. For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will save it. What does it profit them if they gain the whole world, but lose or forfeit themselves?”
This is such a difficult call, and it requires daily work on our part. Contemplation is really a spiritual practice. It is a spiritual discipline. So, it takes practice. It takes discipline. It takes time for us to really embrace and live into this transformative way of thinking.
It requires us to give up control, or really, our delusion that we have control to begin with. And it can be easier for us to give up that idea of control if we know and trust the God who really is in control. It is an exercise in letting go.
Each day, we can wake up and remind ourselves who we are, but more importantly, who God is. We are God’s children, and God is our loving Parent. God is our Creator. God is the One who formed us, and shaped us, and breathed life into us. And we are invited to unite ourselves with God through transformative and contemplative prayer.
Thomas Keating gives us some helpful ways to practice this and think about this. He says, “Imagine you are sitting on the bank of a river. As you sit there, there are going to be thoughts and feelings that come up in your mind.
Acknowledge that you’re having the feeling; acknowledge that you’re having the thought. Don’t hate it, don’t judge it, don’t critique it, don’t, in any way, move against it. Simply name it: Maybe that thought, or feeling is coming from resentment of a certain person or maybe it is coming out of your own insecurity or whatever it might be.’
Then imagine a boat, then imagine placing that thought on the boat and just letting it go down the river. And that river represents your stream of consciousness. Let the thought go away from your mind. Let go of all your thoughts and try to enter into a deeper state of mind. It is a lot like meditation.
And Keating says that the thoughts that just continue to come back into your mind, again and again, are what is called your compulsive patterns of thinking. It might be paranoia, or blame, or self-loathing.
So, observe those thoughts. Become aware of them, and then let them go on the boat. And then, you can allow God to enter into your stream of consciousness. You can allow God to get through the barriers that our mind and our thoughts sometimes build up. And God has a way of doing it.
For me, I have a finger labyrinth in my living room that I use. It’s like a maze but instead there is only one direct path that takes you to the center. So, it is a way for me to just trace my finger along the path, while I try to clear my mind and enter into contemplation.
I know a lot of people who say they are able to really clear their mind when they are mowing the yard. That time becomes a sort of holy time for them where they are able to tap into a sort of contemplation.
And when we enter into the contemplative life and embrace the way that God sees us – then, we are right with God. We don’t have anything to prove. We don’t have to struggle with the ego or the false self. We are simply who we are in God. And there is no way to really describe it. It is just this way of being in community with God and experiencing the fullness of God’s presence in your life. And this is not an easy thing to tap into. I have had, only a handful of moments, where I have caught a glimpse of what this really is.
But this is the pursuit that contemplative prayer offers to us. It is a deep and transformative way to enter into union with God.
When I think about all of this – and all that goes into this – I immediately get overwhelmed. I think, there is no way I can really enter into this life of truly praying without ceasing.
But one of my collogues at the church where I serve, Dave Graybeal, shared something with me the other day that I think is really helpful.
He shared this thought by Fred Craddock, who was a preaching professor at Candler School of Theology. He says this, “We think giving our all to the Lord is like taking a $1,000 bill and laying it on the table – ‘Here’s my life, Lord, I’m giving it all.’
But the reality for most of us is that he sends us to the bank and has us cash in the $1,000 for quarters. We go through life putting out 25 cents here and 50 cents there. Listen to the neighbor kid’s troubles instead of saying, ‘Get lost.’ Go to a committee meeting. Give a cup of water to a shaky old man in a nursing home.
Usually giving our life to Christ isn’t glorious. It’s done in all those little acts of love, 25 cents at a time. It would be easy to go out in a flash of glory; it’s harder to live the Christian life little by little over the long haul.”
I think Fred Craddock is really on to something here. Many times we want to turn in the thousand bucks and be done… but, Jesus calls us to the daily work of denying ourselves, taking up our crosses, and following him. So, we are invited to do God’s work, handing in one quarter at a time. And perhaps that is how we can enter into this practice of denying the self – chipping away at it – a little here – a little there – and entering into the contemplative mind.
So, now, I just want to take some time and lead through one way to practice contemplative prayer. This is actually a practice that has come out of this idea of contemplation, and it has been referred to as centering prayer. And we are just going to take some time to walk through this process so you can get an idea of what this might look like in your own life.
- First, you can find a quiet space – a space that you feel is safe and sacred. It can be in your car. It can be in your closet. It can be in your living room. It can be in the sanctuary at your church. Just find a quiet place where you can get away from the distractions of your everyday lives – get away from the television and the kids and the neighbors and the pets and maybe even your phones! And just devote some time to enter into this space of contemplation.
- Then, find a comfortable place and sit in a comfortable position. Now, don’t sit so comfortably that you fall asleep, but find a place where you can sit for a while without having to move too much.
- Once you are in a quiet and comfortable place, choose a word or a phrase to focus on while you enter into this time of contemplation. It can be a phrase or a word that you come across in Scripture. Just choose a word that is meaningful to you. It might be the word peace. It might be the word Christ. It might be the word grace. Just a word that means something.
- Once you have chosen your word, then you can close your eyes and reflect and meditate and think about that word. And as you sit and reflect, just let all of the different images that pop up, come into your mind. Don’t push the random distracting thoughts away. Receive those thoughts. Acknowledge those thoughts. Name those thoughts. Then, as Thomas Keating says, place those distracting thoughts on a boat in your mind, and let it float down the river. Or, you might just place a notepad next to you – and when things come to your mind – “Oh I have to go to the grocery store. I need to pay that bill” – Just write it down and then just try to enter back into this contemplative mind.
- And just, continue to reflect and meditate and think about that word for as long as you have the space to do so. Maybe at first you can only do 5 minutes… Great. Maybe you can work up to 10 and then 15 and then 20. Most contemplatives do 20 minutes in the morning and 20 minutes in the evening. But just start with a time that you are comfortable with. There is no pressure. Just relax and take your time.
- And before you open your eyes… Spend some time just quieting your mind. Spend time in silence. Try not to think about the word. Try not to think about anything. Simply give yourself time and space, and don’t expect anything. Just open yourself up to receive how God might speak to you.
- And as you do this, it will become easier to enter into this contemplative mind. And as we do this, God will speak – in an audible voice, in a still small voice, in Scripture, through our neighbors, and pastors, and friends. Open yourself up, not only in your quiet time, but in your daily lives as well.
There is a great story about when Father Thomas Keating was leading a training workshop on prayer. A nun was trying to enter into twenty minutes of Centering Prayer, but she was having trouble. She went to Keating and said, “Oh, Father Thomas, I’m such a failure at this prayer. In twenty minutes, I’ve had ten thousand thoughts!” Father Keating responding without missing a beat, “How lovely. Ten thousand opportunities to return to God.”
The great thing about this is that there is no one right way to do it. You don’t have to do it perfectly for God to still speak to you. Our God is a moving and living God who works in our lives, and so God won’t punish us if we don’t do this the right way. God can still speak in us and through us in various ways.
The important thing about prayer is that it enters us into communion with God. It allows us to grow in our relationship with God. And it allows us to hear from God. But it does not need to stop there. We are then called to action. We are called to go out and to reach out to the people around us.
I want to share an excerpt from the Introduction of one of Eugene Peterson’s books about prayer. He writes, “Everyone prays – kind of. It’s our most human action. At the deep center of our lives, we are connected somehow or other with God. That deep center often gets buried under the everyday debris of routine and distraction and chatter, while we shuffle about out of touch and unaware of our true selves. Then a sudden jolt opens a crevasse, exposing for a moment our bedrock self: spontaneously we pray. We pray because it is our most human response. We’re made by and for the voice of God – listening to and answering that voice is our most characteristic act. We are most ourselves when we pray.”
And so, now I just want to invite us to take 30 seconds to just sit in silence. I’ll keep the time. Don’t worry about that. And just take these thirty seconds to stop and enter into a moment of contemplation….
And right as we do this, I want to do something I saw Richard Rohr do one time as he reflected on Psalm 46:10. He simply repeated this passage and dropped of a word each time he said it. So, I am completely stealing this from him, but I thought it was such a beautiful thing.
Be Still , and know that I am God.
Be Still, and know that I am.
Be Still, and know.
Be still.
Be.
